Do we gain more as individuals if we face our darkest secrets, the parts of us we find so reprehensible, the parts that are truly unforgivable? Is there something to be improved by this? If we admit these things, if only to ourselves, do we cower in the face of them or realize and accept they are there and move on? Can we do both? What do you do if there is nothing you can do to make what you have done right except to never do anything like it again?
I’m reading this book about a man who prosecuted some of the worst criminals. He was able to interview many of them as potential witnesses in later cases. He said many of them were completely depressed, as if they were unable to face their own cruelty.
There are actions a person can take that may not violate any societal laws that are immoral nonetheless. We may find them so despicable, it is difficult to live with ourselves. What happens then? Is there a relief in confession? Does knowing another human being knows your worst make it somehow better?
I don’t know. I just don’t know.